While the mores of the time were very restrictive, few could argue that the Victorian era was not one of the most romantic times in our past. To recapture that spirit of gentility, men and women alike are holding tea parties using Victorian customs.

If time allows, invitations to a proper Victorian tea should be written and mailed. A last minute invitation would have been thought of as a social slight; however, if it is unavoidable, the telephone can be used to warmly assure any guest who does not believe the invitation is genuine.
The invitation should state the date, time, and location of the event, which was customarily held in the afternoon. A host or hostess should also welcome the wearing of Victorian dress, if available, or at the very least, classically tailored modest attire for the women and a coat and tie for the gentlemen.

The proper exercise of manners was also an indication of the social status of the hosts and hostesses of this era. Invitees to current parties often practice the custom of asking the hostess if she would like help with the food or its preparation. During Victorian times, that would have been considered a breach of etiquette.

A guest contributed to the event by his or her prompt arrival to and departure from the party, as well as providing pleasant, stimulating conversation in between. These events were perfect parties for the introduction of new persons to the local social scene in small groups. Following the party, a handwritten note thanking the hostess and referencing a particularly enjoyable occurrence or food should be sent as soon as possible.